Our three recents posts have focused on partners, and this month we are bringing it all together in a conversation about how doulas can show up for both partners. 

So often, the person who gave birth or the primary caregiver gets the bulk of the attention during the perinatal period. In many ways, this makes sense! AND the partner is going through a massive change and transformation, too, and they also deserve and need care. In our years of experience, we have historically seen men’s emotional needs getting overlooked (by society, by their doctors, their friends, etc.) during the postpartum period, and we are intentional about making space for partners’ needs.

Ways Doulas Support Your Growing Family

1. Birth processing: Doulas can hold space to listen and process birth from the perspective of both parents. They can validate the family’s experiences and ensure that they feel heard and understood. 
2. Education: Whether you need information about baby wearing, bottle feeding, safe sleep recommendations, or tips for soothing baby, postpartum doulas can offer education in a way that feels less personal than it might feel coming from a partner, relatives, or grandparents, for example. Doulas can serve as the missing how-to book for new babies. We offer non-judgmental listening ears and don’t mind all the questions that you may feel silly asking others.
3. Feeding support: Doulas are often equipped with tools to support families in navigating body feeding or breastfeeding, bottle feeding, pumping, and alternatives like a Supplemental Nursing System (SNS). No matter who is feeding baby or how they are feeding baby, doulas can offer a first line of support and tips. They may also be able to recognize signs of things like tongue tie or shallow latch in order to refer clients to education, lactation specialists, and pediatric dentists.
4. Sleep relief: If partners are tending to the birthing person or primary caregiver as they recover and/or navigate feeding, they may be missing some nap times themselves. The doula can take over baby care during their shift, so that both parents can focus on sleep. It’s also important to note that overnight doulas can maximize the amount of sleep the whole family gets while still supporting your choice of feeding
5. Recovery support: Doulas will have ideas and tools to support healing, from padsicles, to heating pads, to peri bottles, to offering massage, to bringing the birthing person a warm meal in bed, doulas can contribute to protecting rest and recovery after birth.
6. Companionship: Doulas can be a great listening ear! Sometimes during the initial postpartum time, parents are lacking and missing adult connection. A doula’s presence can offer each adult the time and space they need to connect with someone outside of the family. 
7. Household help: Very often, partners take on extra household duties during the initial postpartum period. We all know how fast household chores and tasks can add up, and when we have a new baby in the mix, this gets amplified. Postpartum doulas can pitch in with dishes, laundry, and light household tidying and clean up, so that neither adult needs to be up on their feet for a handful of hours.
8. Referrals to other service providers: From therapist to IBCLCs to books to chefs, postpartum doulas can make referrals based on the family’s unique needs and challenges that are arising. We also love sharing about local parenting groups, like these in Austin!
9. Mental health check ins: While postpartum doulas are not clinically trained and are not therapists, they can help parents identity perinatal mental health needs as they arise. They may also point families to the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale (EPDS), which is a screening tool that families can use to begin conversations with their providers (OBGYN, midwives, PCP, therapist, etc.). Please note that perinatal mood disorders can impact any adult in the home, and it’s been reported that 1 in 7 of all parents experience some sort of mood disorder in the first year of having a new baby in the home.

Find a Doula You Resonate With

As you can see, it’s key that all adults in the household feel good, safe, and trusting with the doula(s) you hire! Find our blog with 8 Steps to Finding the Best Doula for You here.

ABG is Here for You

As always, we are here to support your growing family. Join us in class or reach out about postpartum support in Austin or birth and postpartum support in Asheville! It’s an honor to support your growing family.

*Photo credit: Taylor Gray on Unsplash