Postpartum care is for families of all types, circumstances, and scenarios! In our time serving families, we’ve had the honor of working with families who have experienced surrogacy, adoption, and loss, and we feel strongly that everyone who wants and needs postpartum care has access to affirming and competent providers.

In this article, we will address some of the unique ways doulas can show up for families going through surrogacy, adoption, and loss. 

Surrogacy Support

In the case of surrogacy, there are two families who may be interested in care. The surrogate, sometimes referred to as the gestational carrier, may be interested in care after the birth to support their recovery, and the intended parents, who will be welcoming a newborn into their home, may also be interested in postpartum care to bring some ease to this massive transition. Each family will be going through change and healing!

The intended parents may want and need more focus on baby care, and a postpartum doula may spend a significant amount of time supporting them with hands-on education and resources. The care for the surrogate may be focused primarily on their physical recovery, as well as emotional processing. Doulas are gifted in switching gears to accommodate the needs and wishes of each family they work with. That said, it’s always helpful for families to name their goals for working with a postpartum doula, as well as to give feedback and voice their needs throughout their time together, as things may change from week to week.

Adoption Support

When a family is adopting, things can sometimes move very quickly. The much-anticipated process of having a baby or child is suddenly happening in just a few days’ time! Postpartum doulas can work with adoptive families who are bringing newborns or infants into their family. While we typically work with families who are adopting newborns or infants, some doulas (including our founder, Allison) may be open to working with parents adopting older children too. In this case, the work will look more like parenting coaching than postpartum doula support.

Postpartum support will enable the intended parents to prioritize rest and get support with the steep learning curve that comes with welcoming a new baby or infant into the family. Much like surrogacy, the birth parent may also want postpartum recovery support as this is a big transition for them, too! There are physical recovery needs, as well as potential emotional care needs.

Loss Support

When families are processing a loss, it can be difficult to know how to gather support. At ABG, we strongly encourage folks who are experiencing loss to prepare for all elements of the loss– emotional, physical, logistical, etc. Postpartum doulas can offer in-home support that includes recovery care, referrals to other supportive providers or resources, support with processing, and incorporating rituals to honor the baby and the loss they are experiencing. Some doulas may also offer virtual care, which can provide a supportive space for processing and grieving.

It should also be noted that many families who do give birth to a live baby or have a baby via surrogacy or adoption have also experienced prior loss. So while the loss may not be actively happening, the grief of previous losses may show up, even in the midst of joy. Family building is such a tender process and, so often, families experience a confusing mashup up seemingly contradictory feelings. Doulas are here for all of the feelings!

ABG is Here for You

We are here to support your family and help you navigate the challenges and celebrations of family building. Reach out about postpartum support in Austin or birth and postpartum support in Asheville!

*Photo credit: Eyasu Etsub on Unsplash